![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
A few months ago, Ma'am, I admit I would have been guilty of that.
[ It's pretty much all he's ever known. Deep inside all the "Fight the Good Fight", which was true as well, there was always "The Fight's all I've known. I was built for war." ]
But really I'm just sad that if things had turned out different, I may have met all of you sooner.
[ He really means that. His love and appreciation for the presence of every one he's met in the few months since he joined the Pax Deorum Conspiraces. And how they've changed him. ]
Joining the fight: Not for the fight. But to lift what little weight I could have and maybe have helped save some one or two lives. [ And gotten to know you all before all the shit you had to go through ]
[ It's pretty much all he's ever known. Deep inside all the "Fight the Good Fight", which was true as well, there was always "The Fight's all I've known. I was built for war." ]
But really I'm just sad that if things had turned out different, I may have met all of you sooner.
[ He really means that. His love and appreciation for the presence of every one he's met in the few months since he joined the Pax Deorum Conspiraces. And how they've changed him. ]
Joining the fight: Not for the fight. But to lift what little weight I could have and maybe have helped save some one or two lives. [ And gotten to know you all before all the shit you had to go through ]
[Now that is a marked change, indeed. The intrigue shows on Kasumi's face as she's watching him, but it eases off with a smile. A genuine one.]
Well, what is past is past. What matters now is that you are here with us, and perhaps it was meant to be that way.
[Who knows? If he had been around sooner, would he really have been able to help?]
Well, what is past is past. What matters now is that you are here with us, and perhaps it was meant to be that way.
[Who knows? If he had been around sooner, would he really have been able to help?]
[ He smiles ] Yeah, no point on dwelling on what-ifs. [ Books on the Chaos Theory and time-travel come to mind. A slight change anywhere, can change everything ] Just keep walking forward, right?
I'll keep that in mind, Ma'am. [ Brig nods, taking in her words. He takes a sip of his sake. ] I mean, there's no point walking off a cliff. But it's always good to keep walking home.
Yeah. [ A small smile ] Yeah, I do.
I plan to make a lot of time for J and K when I get back. It's been close to a month since I was home. The break I had with them before we flew over here was too short.
I plan to make a lot of time for J and K when I get back. It's been close to a month since I was home. The break I had with them before we flew over here was too short.
Edited 2014-05-30 08:51 (UTC)
They're doing great. Falner's been good to them. J's licensed with Netsach now and K's doing great at Balamb. [ There's light behind his eyes as he speaks of his family ]
J's a Hunter now and following more in my footsteps than her mom did and K... [ A beat ] finding the best way to bring her up is always on my mind.
[ His expression is thoughtful. She's an alchemist. 4-years-old, yes, but she is as much an alchemist as she is a little girl. Denying that would be pretty much like Elsa in that old movie Frozen. ]
J's a Hunter now and following more in my footsteps than her mom did and K... [ A beat ] finding the best way to bring her up is always on my mind.
[ His expression is thoughtful. She's an alchemist. 4-years-old, yes, but she is as much an alchemist as she is a little girl. Denying that would be pretty much like Elsa in that old movie Frozen. ]
I... actually don't know, Ma'am. J and I have never really talked about him. [ Brig had never met the man. He came and went with M. Then there was J and Brig always felt himself her long-distance father figure. Abandonment issues seemed innate in Prometheans. He was just lucky he never felt it.
It dawns on him that, with the resources the conspiracies he was in now, it may be easy to track him. And that J, strong front as she is, would probably never initiate the conversation with Brig. He feels the pang of failure cut at him. It shows on his face. ]
It dawns on him that, with the resources the conspiracies he was in now, it may be easy to track him. And that J, strong front as she is, would probably never initiate the conversation with Brig. He feels the pang of failure cut at him. It shows on his face. ]
Ah. I suppose it does not matter...?
[Or it does so much to Jessica Leitman that she prefers not to speak of it. She has not had the opportunity to observe that one closely, nor has she bothered listening to any whispers in the woman's direction. As such, she is as much in the dark as Brigade is.]
[Or it does so much to Jessica Leitman that she prefers not to speak of it. She has not had the opportunity to observe that one closely, nor has she bothered listening to any whispers in the woman's direction. As such, she is as much in the dark as Brigade is.]
[ He thinks of J. And how she's built her world around little K, and supporting him ]
I'll try to slide it in some time, Ma'am, and see if it doesn't. [ There's a soft smile and a look in his eyes full of gratitude. He's always just seen her so strong, that he's forgotten she was a child too, before. His second little princess. ]
I'll try to slide it in some time, Ma'am, and see if it doesn't. [ There's a soft smile and a look in his eyes full of gratitude. He's always just seen her so strong, that he's forgotten she was a child too, before. His second little princess. ]
I won't, Ma'am. [ Brig nods. ] I'll approach the Dovetailor if ever there's a need and she isn't busy.
[ It's gotten a bit late. And Brig's still scared of how the last time ended. It shows in his shoulders. He finishes his cup. There's a minute quiver as he does. ]
Thank you for tonight, Ma'am. I've missed this. [ Said in that awkward manner of people running away from a social setting, though unconsciously hoping they'll be invited to stay ] I think I've taken enough of your time.
Thank you for tonight, Ma'am. I've missed this. [ Said in that awkward manner of people running away from a social setting, though unconsciously hoping they'll be invited to stay ] I think I've taken enough of your time.
[ Brig finishes his drink and sets the cup carefully on the table. He bows respectfully ] I would very much like that, Ma'am. I'll take my leave. [ And he gets up and goes. Deep inside, he's very happy for this night ]
[ He and Hotaru take the 4 AM flight back to Tokyo, which means that straight after spending a good part of his evening curled up at Joshua LaRue's side yet feeling like the inches between them were miles and after going on duty, he's silently preparing his things, pressing a kiss to Josh's forehead (one that lingers too long, and makes his chest ache), he and Hotaru get driven to the airport by Diego Salazar, the latest South American to join his conspiracy. The boy doesn't ask questions.
Good on him, for the moment. Obedience is sometimes difficult to teach in Zangyaku's special cases, and outside of that? Hikaru's pretty damned sure that he wouldn't know how to answer anybody who asked him how he was doing.
He could have ported to Seigi, or maybe Blood Walked. He took the flight not just because he was looking out for Hotaru, but because he was hoping to clear his head. It didn't work out that way. What happened instead was that the heavy, tight feeling in his chest just got worse. Midway through the flight, it was joined by a headache thrumming on his temples and sitting just behind his eyes.
Suffice to say, once all of that really registered and it was clear that short of knocking himself out he wouldn't be able to get rid of it, he quietly drew up some psychic walls between him and his Wardens, keeping them from seeing what was really going on.
He can feel their concern radiating behind those defenses he's made now, as he's walking down the quiet corridors of the Shinta compound in Seigi. It's 8 PM, an hour after dinner. He hasn't dressed down yet, even if he's already settled Hotaru down for the night with Thanatos and his older sister to keep her company. After he has talked business with Kasumi Aoi, the Mother of the Wolf, he plans to go back out there. Duty calls, always and ever.
Have the silhouette of the boy whom you once called(?) your son first, then a quiet knock on the shoji door that opens up into your private quarters. The weekend is about to start: it has always been your custom to have one night where you step out of your office and keep to yourself in your rooms. The rest of the weekend may, after all, be only too busy with engagements. With people. ]
Good on him, for the moment. Obedience is sometimes difficult to teach in Zangyaku's special cases, and outside of that? Hikaru's pretty damned sure that he wouldn't know how to answer anybody who asked him how he was doing.
He could have ported to Seigi, or maybe Blood Walked. He took the flight not just because he was looking out for Hotaru, but because he was hoping to clear his head. It didn't work out that way. What happened instead was that the heavy, tight feeling in his chest just got worse. Midway through the flight, it was joined by a headache thrumming on his temples and sitting just behind his eyes.
Suffice to say, once all of that really registered and it was clear that short of knocking himself out he wouldn't be able to get rid of it, he quietly drew up some psychic walls between him and his Wardens, keeping them from seeing what was really going on.
He can feel their concern radiating behind those defenses he's made now, as he's walking down the quiet corridors of the Shinta compound in Seigi. It's 8 PM, an hour after dinner. He hasn't dressed down yet, even if he's already settled Hotaru down for the night with Thanatos and his older sister to keep her company. After he has talked business with Kasumi Aoi, the Mother of the Wolf, he plans to go back out there. Duty calls, always and ever.
Have the silhouette of the boy whom you once called(?) your son first, then a quiet knock on the shoji door that opens up into your private quarters. The weekend is about to start: it has always been your custom to have one night where you step out of your office and keep to yourself in your rooms. The rest of the weekend may, after all, be only too busy with engagements. With people. ]
Edited 2014-08-21 16:03 (UTC)
[ If there is anything that Kasumi Aoi firmly believes, it is that, no matter the years, no matter the trials, no matter her own personal feelings where it concerns her son: she is his mother, will always be his mother, and every step she has taken since she picked herself up from her own fall back in Hikaru Shinta's twenty-seventh cycle, it is done with his best interests at heart.
Theirs is not a perfect relationship, and it is her opinion that any mother who has illusions that such a thing is possible is projecting expectations that are unfair, both to themselves and to their child.
This is why she has kept her silence, even as whispers reached her ears of the events that have transpired in Colina de las Espadas. Even as she feels through the Warden connection that there is a heaviness that he will not speak of, a heartache he cannot voice, and that he is, to put it simply, not as well as those who have not watched him for as long as she ( and a handful few, ) would presume.
( Perhaps -- just... perhaps -- if things were not so complex between them given then and what the years afterwards held for them both, she would have reached out to him the way the other Wardens wish to, out of concern. But then again, she is not that kind of woman. )
So she bides her time, lights the pipe that was given as a gift so very long ago, and turns her gaze out her window towards the rest of Seigi. She does this, even as their leader draws up the psychic walls around him like a thick cloak.
She can wait. The patient know that it is always good to wait.
When that knock comes, she bows her chin and takes a long and satisfying puff to relax herself before she lifts her face towards the direction of her door. Does she really need to say out loud that you may enter? You know her habits as she knows yours. ]
Theirs is not a perfect relationship, and it is her opinion that any mother who has illusions that such a thing is possible is projecting expectations that are unfair, both to themselves and to their child.
This is why she has kept her silence, even as whispers reached her ears of the events that have transpired in Colina de las Espadas. Even as she feels through the Warden connection that there is a heaviness that he will not speak of, a heartache he cannot voice, and that he is, to put it simply, not as well as those who have not watched him for as long as she ( and a handful few, ) would presume.
( Perhaps -- just... perhaps -- if things were not so complex between them given then and what the years afterwards held for them both, she would have reached out to him the way the other Wardens wish to, out of concern. But then again, she is not that kind of woman. )
So she bides her time, lights the pipe that was given as a gift so very long ago, and turns her gaze out her window towards the rest of Seigi. She does this, even as their leader draws up the psychic walls around him like a thick cloak.
She can wait. The patient know that it is always good to wait.
When that knock comes, she bows her chin and takes a long and satisfying puff to relax herself before she lifts her face towards the direction of her door. Does she really need to say out loud that you may enter? You know her habits as she knows yours. ]
Edited 2014-08-21 16:41 (UTC)
[ He picked up the sound of your heartbeat the moment he was out there, giving him the perfect means to figure out where you are (by the windows where the breeze comes in, lounging back among your favorite pillows, smoking from your favorite pipe one he gave you). It was calm and steady even after you knew that he was coming around. No hitch appears afterward, nor any other tell-tale sign that you're going to move, or invite him in.
Granted, it was not like you would ever call for him to come around, not when you leave this particular door to your chambers open. You'll have to excuse him: he's rather bad at being your son.
So - after taking a deep breath - he's stepping inside, moving towards you, then dropping down on both knees on one of the floor pillows. He then arranges himself properly before you before he bows his head in greeting. You may note that he hasn't met your gaze or looked at your face, not once, since he entered. ]
I'm home.
[ Seigi, in many ways, is your space more than it is his own, and your chambers are most definitely yours to keep. It's only proper that he greets you with respect, in and beyond the fact that these days? You're standing at the helm of his conspiracy a lot more often than usual. ]
Granted, it was not like you would ever call for him to come around, not when you leave this particular door to your chambers open. You'll have to excuse him: he's rather bad at being your son.
So - after taking a deep breath - he's stepping inside, moving towards you, then dropping down on both knees on one of the floor pillows. He then arranges himself properly before you before he bows his head in greeting. You may note that he hasn't met your gaze or looked at your face, not once, since he entered. ]
I'm home.
[ Seigi, in many ways, is your space more than it is his own, and your chambers are most definitely yours to keep. It's only proper that he greets you with respect, in and beyond the fact that these days? You're standing at the helm of his conspiracy a lot more often than usual. ]
Okaeri.
[ Her tone is even, but kind. She is also pushing the brazier his way with the practiced, elegant motions of a woman of her experience and station before she holds out the pipe ( hers -- and his, should he wish to smoke from it ) in his direction.
She has been quietly counting down the minutes to his arrival at her door, fully aware that he would not come until his youngest sister was settled and possibly put to bed. It does not take eyes to see the amount of care her son takes with Hotaru Fukuzawa. After all, family has always been important to the Blade King. It is one of the reasons why all of Zangyaku address each other as brothers and sisters, regardless of age or rank.
( She can see his pain through the little things: that averted gaze, even the dip in tone in his voice. If she were another womanAsami Fukuzawa, perhaps she might have chosen instead to reach out and tip up that bowed chin, drawn those violet eyes to hers and asked simply: What is wrong, my son?
But again, she is not that woman. So she offers this instead: ) ]
The little one has been put to bed?
[ Her tone is even, but kind. She is also pushing the brazier his way with the practiced, elegant motions of a woman of her experience and station before she holds out the pipe ( hers -- and his, should he wish to smoke from it ) in his direction.
She has been quietly counting down the minutes to his arrival at her door, fully aware that he would not come until his youngest sister was settled and possibly put to bed. It does not take eyes to see the amount of care her son takes with Hotaru Fukuzawa. After all, family has always been important to the Blade King. It is one of the reasons why all of Zangyaku address each other as brothers and sisters, regardless of age or rank.
( She can see his pain through the little things: that averted gaze, even the dip in tone in his voice. If she were another woman
But again, she is not that woman. So she offers this instead: ) ]
The little one has been put to bed?
Edited 2014-08-21 17:08 (UTC)
[ And as she is preparing what will be their communal space, he is shifting, drawing one leg up close to his chest and letting the other relax against the floor. He's taking the type with a quick and appreciate look in her direction, and taking a drag. A long drag, with a notably long exhale.
His shoulders have not relaxed yet, not the way that they normally would after getting a good fix. ]
Yes, she has. [ A wan smile, as he remembers the way she put both of her hands on either side of her face and drew him in so that she could kiss him on the forehead. ] Setsuna is going to stay with her again, at least until I'm back from my Walk.
[ Tohru will be with him, at least in one sense of the word. Celestial Masters have such a convenient range of abilities. ]
His shoulders have not relaxed yet, not the way that they normally would after getting a good fix. ]
Yes, she has. [ A wan smile, as he remembers the way she put both of her hands on either side of her face and drew him in so that she could kiss him on the forehead. ] Setsuna is going to stay with her again, at least until I'm back from my Walk.
[ Tohru will be with him, at least in one sense of the word. Celestial Masters have such a convenient range of abilities. ]
[ A pleasant smile, even as she has turned to retrieve the box from which she has been filling her pipe. She will move that his way now, as if nothing is amiss -- because, really? Why would anything be? Your space is your own. If you so choose to retreat, that is your prerogative, as it is Theirs to respect the need for it in turn. ]
Good, [ sitting back now and turning her gaze back out the window. ] A flight as long as the one you both took must have been taxing.
[ There's a small smile on her lips as she watches the flickering of lights in the dark. ]
The fireflies are beautiful tonight.
Good, [ sitting back now and turning her gaze back out the window. ] A flight as long as the one you both took must have been taxing.
[ There's a small smile on her lips as she watches the flickering of lights in the dark. ]
The fireflies are beautiful tonight.
Page 8 of 10